momtra: permission to give yourself space

momtra:  permission to take space

We’ve all been there, haven’t we?  Feeling the pressure of showing up for our lives to the point where we are simply too depleted to be any use to anyone, especially ourselves.

That’s when a little space can go a long, long way.

I myself have needed this mantra more than ever in the last six weeks as I’ve somewhat fallen apart from PHYSICAL & EMOTIONAL EXHAUSTION:  mystery illness, THE LOSS OF MY FATHER, difficulty adapting to a new community, & a general midlife existential crisis about the real mission & meaning of my life.  It was imperative that I truly embrace the message I kept hearing & just BE for a while.

I rested.  I went really slow.  I didn’t speak much.  I prepared new meals, read, DID YOGA.   I took photosnot to document anything like my journalist-trained brain typically does, but just for FUN.

I played with my girls, made art with them, took them on outings to the beach & park.  & I said NO sometimes to being the tickle monster or human jungle gym, stating firmly that I needed to rest but would watch them play & be available for as many hugs as they wanted.

I didn’t force myself to focus or be linear when my head felt too foggy to think cohesively.  (Which is why I’ve been MIA for the last several weeks).

& you know what?  I feel SO. MUCH. BETTER!!!!

(I’m certain GOING OFF GLUTEN has something to do with it, too… but that’s another post for another day).

I can now clearly see how HARD I was pushing myself in the last … oh, five years!  UG!  (Note to self:  thanks but no thanks)!

It is without coincidence that my whole family seems to be in much greater harmony now, too…. funny how that works.

I share this with you not to be ME-centric but to reveal my truth to you in hopes that you won’t feel so alone should you be struggling with that sense of overwhelm, exhaustion, mamma-guilt & quite possibly even rage, too.   My body literally became inflamed from within I was so pissed off about so many things!  & I kept it all in, not wanting to be “negative” or burden anyone with my process.  A real recipe for an emotional/physical/spiritual explosion!

It is crucial you take care of YOU as well as your loved ones, dear mamma.  If you keep putting yourself last it will eventually bite you in the ass. This I know from experience!

I hope you’ll be able to take the space you need to rest, play, breathe, dream & be when you need it, too.

If “taking” it feels to tricky, call upon a kindred spirit to help you “create” it.  Even just an hour of  space JUST FOR YOU can be the elixir that can bring the sparkle back into your beautiful, loving heart.

You deserve it mamma!

XO Cricket

 

Inner grit & glitter.

THE SPARKLE POWER PROJECT.

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